Joy After Loss

Wow, it has been a long time since I have written here. It's crazy to think that just over 5 years ago my life drastically changed!!  Before September 21, 2013, I was loving life. We had just moved to a new city, for a new start, and were very excited about it.  We had no idea what was coming to us just six short months after we made that move.  

Sending balloons off on 5 year 'angel'versary

Our world came crashing down on that sunny, warm, Septmember day.  Our lives were left shattered, never to be the same.  There were many days following Jaylen's accident that I pleaded to God to help me get through to the next day.  There were many days that I really didn't think I was going to make it.  As I look back and read parts of this blog, it takes me back to that dark, dark time, and it's amazing to think that we, as a family, are all still standing on our own two feet, and have actually found joy again.  With having joy again, that doesn't mean that we don't miss Jaylen any less.  We still wish our circumstances were different and that Jaylen was still here, but I've learned that through your darkest of dark moments in life, there is hope.  Hope that the sun will shine again and that it IS possible to come out on top.

We have had a lot of changes in our life since losing Jaylen.  Two of the biggest and most beautiful changes that we have been blessed with are the two addtitions to our family.  It's hard to believe that Taysen just turned 3 and Trinity turned 18 months today.  I remember shortly after losing Jaylen, the overwhelming feeling that Mike and I both got, to have another child.  We both felt that not only one, but two special spirits needed to come to our family. They didn't come without trial and more heartache, with miscarriages inbetween both of them, but they are here and they are TRUE BLESSINGS!!!  It's fun to watch them.  I see so many similarties of Jaylen in both of them, in different ways.  By no way are they a replacement to Jaylen, but a true bonus to our family that we may not have had otherwise. 

One other change that has happened in our lives is that I started my own skincare business.  I was in no way looking for something like that, but ultimately, the grieving process took a huge toll on my skin. I aged a ton and hated the way I looked. I was introduced to some incredible products, was intrigued by the business structure, and decided to jump in and be a consultant for this company.

Never in a million years did I think this little skincare business would be something that would bring so much joy back into my life, but it has been a true unexpected blessing, and something that I needed!!  When we lost Jaylen, I lost so much of me!!! I was BROKEN, LOST, and had no idea how I was going to go on.  Since starting this business, I am finding me again, and actually a whole new me.  A me that I never knew was there and someone that I love. I have found joy in helping others and in my business, that is just what I do. I help others find confidence in themselves again by either using these products, or even joining me in business. It truly has been an incredible experience for me.   

I don't have the opportunity to write like I use to, but as you can see, running a household, taking care of two toddlers, having a full time job, along with now having my own business, I am a little busy.  I would love to invite you all to follow me on Instagram at lifeandloveafterloss if you would like. I have started this account to share that even in the darkest of sorrows, you can over come, and find joy again.  It shows my life, my loves, and the joys again.  I hope to bring encouragement and motivation as others follow me in this journey.  Losing a child is probably one of the HARDEST trials a person can go through.  I want to share with others that we CAN do hard things and come out on top. There are still hard days. Days that I cry, hurt, and wish things were different, but I am smiling again and that is nothing short of a miracle.